the morning after is always the same.

sweet.
and
full of hyperbole.

then.
just like that.

back to reality.

i've been trying to deny this all morning.
but
i couldn't sleep.
because
i kept having dreams
that
i was pregnant.



???

who put those ideas in my head?

i could barely sleep last night.
because i didn't want the dream to end.

i wish it were groundhogs day.
so it could be re-played over and over.

forever.

and this way.
there will be no trip to california.
or
waking up at 4:40am to call.

and

there will be no more
doubt.

because when it is live.
it is real.

i just might explode.

today.

at 1:15pm.